How Do I Get My Ex Back: The Dreaded Friends Stage

When getting an ex back, some people immediately go for the friend angle. It sounds ideal, right? I mean your best bet is to have some relationship with your previous partner, rather than none at all? This is where things can get hazy.   

Keep in mind the differences between being friends and being lovers. If you are searching for ways to get your ex back, then your ultimate goal is not to just be friends. So why set yourself up for this less than desirable position? Of course, if you have decided things are officially over and you truly want to be friends, then go for it.  There is nothing wrong with having a healthy relationship with your ex, provided enough time has passed for both parties to get over the gripes and longings. 

Honesty is very important to create a strong foundation. If you have devised a way to get ex back that involves pretending to just be friends, stop what you are doing and read on.  Do you really want to base your effort on a lie? That may sound, dramatic, but it is true. If you mislead your ex you are starting out on the wrong foot. If you cannot be honest with him or her, then you should still be in the no contact phase of things. You will not find lying among the proven ways to get your ex back. 

Now, perhaps you have gotten over some things, talked about it, and are at least on sociable terms with each other. This is a good step. It means you can interact relatively freely without feeling too awkward.  You should be at this point without laying it on heavy and pretending to be their friend. 

Getting back with your ex will take time and patience. Remember to focus on the things that attracted them to you in the first place. What was it they liked about you? You need to reconstruct that initial level of attraction. Otherwise, you will be stuck at friend status indefinitely.  

You want to be closer to them, but avoid being pushy. Limit physical contact and treat them as a friend, rather than a lover.  Even if you are affectionate with your close friends, make a point to limit this with your ex. You do not want them to feel suffocated or overwhelmed. If you want to know how to get back with an ex, then put yourself in their position. Would you want the person you just ended things with climbing all over you? Probably not. This could result in even your friend status revoked. You want them to desire your company, not shy away from it. 

Without appearing obvious, let them remember what was so attractive about you to begin with.  There is nothing wrong with going a little further and wearing that perfume they loved or that shirt they thought looked sexy on you once in a while. There is no foolproof get ex back advice that always works, but these tips will give you a great start in gaining a second chance. 

By Gene Alias   

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