Save Your Relationship Learn How to Stop a Breakup

You have given it lots of thought. You miss your ex dearly and wish nothing more than to be in their arms again. You have considered what life will be like with them and know that it is what you desire in life. On the other hand, perhaps you are still in a relationship, but you can tell things are going wrong. You are sitting back and watching as the love of your life is slowly pushing away. In either situation, the relationship can be salvaged; however, it will take strength and patience on both ends.   

Getting Back with Your Ex Means Getting Off the Rollercoaster 

You have given it lots of thought. You miss your ex dearly and wish nothing more than to be in their arms again. You have considered what life will be like with them and know that it is what you desire in life. On the other hand, perhaps you are still in a relationship, but you can tell things are going wrong. You are sitting back and watching as the love of your life is slowly pushing away.  In either situation, the relationship can be salvaged; however, it will take strength and patience on both ends. 

Getting Back with Your Ex Means Getting Off the Rollercoaster 

You have season passes for this ride.  You have been round and round before. Ever since the breakup, it is a constant stream of grief, anger, self-pity, and depression, with a full spectrum of emotions in between. The same may be said for those dealing with the deterioration of a relationship. In either situation, you must take a deep breath and get off the emotional rollercoaster. If you want to know how to stop a break up, learn how to keep your outbursts in check. 

Do not view the other person as the enemy or source of your pain. If that were all you can see them as, why would you want to save your relationship in the first place? Understand that they are no evil demon only out to hurt you. They are only human just as you are. You both make mistakes. When you feel the surge of anger, hatred or sadness, try a healthier alternative than yelling, screaming or otherwise emptying it out on him or her.  Try writing it down on paper or take up a hobby that lets you work that energy out, such as sports or other athletic activities. 

When you do have an important discussion with your significant other, or ex, remember to check that baggage at the door. They will be much less receptive to even considering a relationship again if you are arguing, yelling, or blubbering every time they try to talk to you about what is wrong. Not to mention, high emotion usually results in hurtful words that cannot be taken back once said. Rather than make a situation worse, try to improve what remains. 

This does not mean you should not share your honest feelings and issues with the other person. Quite the opposite, but do so as constructively as you can. Do not point the finger and exclaim, instead explain what bothers you and why.  Tell them how you feel and how certain things may have hurt you. It is quite possible one party had no idea they were upsetting the other. This knowledge could save your relationship. 

Consider the “Why” Before Figuring Out How to Save a Relationship 

Before you choke back your tears and take the first baby steps in the relationship repair process, make sure you are doing the right thing. Even if you do not want to face up to the facts, it is obvious something went wrong.  The question is what and how badly did it effect things between you both. Is saving your relationship really your best option? 

Some people feel an unhealthy need to be in a relationship. It could be because they have been with the person so long, they are afraid of adapting without them. It could be because they need to be in any relationship because they cannot handle being alone. In either situation, the result is not healthy. Make sure you or your ex do not fall into this category. You may be setting yourself up for more heartache later. 

Winning back your ex or preventing the breakup completely is no small task. It requires commitment and a willingness to communicate. Make sure you are doing the right thing by attempting to fix the situation. You may only be prolonging the heartache. If you are honest with yourself and your partner, you can save your relationship. 

By Gene Alias   

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